Bill* is reaching out for help.
“I have gone outside my marriage on multiple occasions, conversing with other women. Infidelity has happened more than once. Each time it happens, I vow to my wife and myself that I will change, and it won’t happen again. Inevitably, it does.
It’s almost become cyclical at this point, and I’m sick of constantly putting my wife through this terrible behavior. After doing some serious self-evaluation, I believe I’ve identified the root cause of the issue as an over-engagement in social media/porn, which leads to a disengagement from my wife.
I want to do everything possible to save my marriage and be present for my family. I need someone who can help me, please.”
Sex is an ongoing compulsion.
For as long as you can remember, you have had an issue with sex. You can say you are even obsessed with it. Usually, it was just watching lots of porn. Still, over the past few years or so, it has manifested into real-life encounters with sex workers, sugar babies, and extramarital affairs.
Your partner recently became aware of this, and you agreed to get help even though some of you feel you are beyond help.
Learning to control your sexual urges and be able to focus on the other parts of your life is something you desperately seek. You want to stop being distracted all day and night to fulfill the gnawing compulsion and be fully present in your life, your integrity, and your authenticity again.
Therapy can help address those compulsions.
You didn’t arrive on the planet this way. Something happened. Some moment in childhood or adolescence was a catalyst to you using erotic fantasy as an escape.
In some way, it was a survival mechanism that got you through pain you didn’t want to feel. It was an adaptive strategy that became maladaptive over time.
My main goal is to help you learn the tools to manage the triggers that lead to your compulsive sexual behavior. We will work to identify the underlying causes for your sexual compulsions and then devise ways for you to have healthy sexual relationships and get out of the ever-present shame cycle.
Take the next step to get help.
I am here to say that you may have hurt people in pursuit of your compulsion, but that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to find the insight to live another way.
Now is the time to let me help you change your behavior. Please contact me through the form in the footer.
*Please note that Bill is not an actual client but a representation of problems faced by many of my clients.